Yesterday you said tomorrow.
I have not been seeking God.
I have not read my Bible since last week. The last time I prayed was yesterday when I asked God to lower the temperature/make it more breezy/make sure I didn’t mess up my make-up (all of these requests were due to the photoshoot). Yesterday morning I asked Him to turn our water back on (for some reason the water in the apartment just randomly stopped working yesterday morn, even though it had been working fine. &then I had just exercised and had to leave the house – sweaty and stinky. but it did come back on, and me mum and I were happy campers). The point is that all I am doing is asking God for things. There used to be once upon a time when I would actually talk to Him. I’d tell Him about my day, thank Him for all that He has done for me, things of that nature. There is nothing wrong with asking God for things. John 14:13-14 (NIV), Jesus says, “And I will do whatever you ask in My name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. You may ask Me for anything in My name, and I will do it.”
See, obviously God doesn’t mind us asking for things. But you cannot take these verses out of context. You cannot ask for God to kill your obsessive neighbor “in His name” and expect that to happen. Now I didn’t want to become preachy in this blog (especially because I have much to learn myself), but in My name means: operating under One’s authority and for the Authority’s purpose. Whatever petitions God answers obviously has to be within His will, for His purpose, and for the glory of His name. <– Sidenotes
My relationship with my Father used to be so much greater, so much deeper, less shallow. It is not His fault of course. I am the one that strayed. I am the one that is hypocritical. And I think that that is affecting every aspect of my life. It affects how I treat my mum, my friends, my exercise goals, my laziness to do schoolwork. Everything. I miss my life being centered around God.
Two days ago, I was chilling with my mentor (Christian youth mentor). Towards the end of our chill, she brought up God/devotions. I thought, “Ugh, I don’t really want to talk about this.” Wow. Yes. I actually thought that, or something to that effect. I’m not abashed to be a Christian. But I AM abashed that I have been a poor representation of my Lord & Savior. He is worthy of so much more, and I need to glorify Him.